>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>HIPPY STORY PART 3

he Hippy awoke in a clean fresh cell that was devoid of bars or a door. The Hippy got to his feet and suddenly noticed how cold the floor was. He looked down and noticed that he was not wearing any socks. A pang of painstruck a chord in his heart and he couldn't help but feel as though he had lost part of himself. In fact he had, they had surgically removed his appendix whilst he was asleep. The Hippy tried to walk through the doorway with no door but was flung backwards by an immense kinetic force. The Hippy reasoned that some form of force field was in operation. The Hippy sat on the floor for a while and fell asleep again. He was awoken roughly by somebody shaking him and shouting "WAKE UP YOU LAZY BASTARD !!!" very loudly in his ear. Luckily his hair formed a protective shield and his sensitive hearing was not impaired. Captain Bwyers rapidly explained the situation to the Hippy.

"I need your help, those alien lifeforms that have been living on your feet have been systematically killing all of my crew, they seem to excrete a smelly substance which renders the victim unconscious, then they enter the body through an orifice, they are not discriminate about which one."; the captain grimaced. "They then germinate inside the body before eventually ripping their way out through the stomach usually at socially embarrassing times. I have never met anything quite so disgusting, present company excepted."

The captain paused for a while. "You must help us, you are our only hope"

The Hippy looked blankly at the captain. "Pardon ?".

Captain Bwyers, science officer sock, the doctor and two minions followed the Hippy down the gently curving corridor. The background music was tense so you knew that something was about to happen. Sure enough the two minions suddenly went into convulsions and the two socks erupted from their stomachs showering the three officers in tomato ketchup and pigs organs, often used in the gory bits of low budget stories such as this one. The Hippy was spared this as he had legged it off down the corridor as soon as he had spotted the two minions. He reappeared when the background music returned to its usual format. The captain was violently ill and the doctor mummed to himself. "Interesting, this man had the liver of a pig, and this one over here had the eyeballs of a cow and the brain of a frog, not only that but he had four hearts, the special effects department have been a little bit over enthusiastic I fear, the remainder of this story could become quite sick."

The Hippy didn't feel to well and farted, after which he felt much better. The others

however had to retreat to a safe distance. The captain shouted to the Hippy. "Where did they go ?" The Hippy shouted back "What ?"

The captain shouted louder, "I SAID WHERE DID THEY GO ?"

The Hippy replied "What ?" The captain tried to shout louder but there were only two

typefaces available and so he had to move closer to the Hippy. This however brought him within range of the fart still hanging in the atmosphere, and the captain flaked out struggling for clean fresh air. The two socks peered cautiously out from their little den in the air conditioning system and awaited an opportunity to get inside the body lying on the floor. The Hippy walked up to the captain and tried to wake him up. The science officer and the doctor had gone in search of some gas masks. The socks made their move. The first sock dived up the captains left trouser leg and the second sock crawled up his right. What happened next cannot be divulged here otherwise the author might get flung into prison, but suffice to say the captains eyes suddenly opened very wide. The Hippy stepped back allowing the captain to stand up and go screaming down the corridor. The Hippy ran after him. The captain ran fitfully onto the bridge and curled himself up into a ball underneath the helmsmans position. The helmsman changed his position immediately and the captain had to go and find somewhere else to hide. The Hippy blundered onto the bridge. All the physical exertion after years of dormancy had set up a chain reaction in the Hippy causing

him to Flatulate a lot. PHRRRRRRTTTT! The Hippy expostulated. Three people fainted from lack of oxygen and the captain went into convulsions, then the captain appeared to grow a pair of breasts. The Hippy was quite surprised "Oh wow!". Then the socks erupted from the chest of the doomed captain landing on the arms of the captains chair. Twenty gallons of blood washed across the entire set, and the special effects man in charge of blood (Tomato Ketchup) was sacked. The tension on the bridge was unbearable as the two socks leapt to the floor and slowly advanced on the communications officer who's pretty little legs were wobbling so much it was hard to keep the story in focus. The first sock jumped for he throat whilst the second sock made for her mouth. The Hippy watched on gobsmacked.

PPPPPHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT! "Oh wow! Get a whiff of that one !" The communications officer died, gracefully slipping to the floor, and the socks stopped what they were doing, there was something awfully familiar about that sound......... and the smell. They turned menacingly and began to advance on the Hippy.

Meanwhile the science officer and the doctor had ran down to the hangar deck and were in the process of hi-jacking a shuttle craft in a blatant act of cowardice. The science officer hastily scanned the controls and put the shuttle into gear, slipping the clutch as he did so and causing the shuttle to reverse into the hull. The doctor shouted at him, but the science officer ignored him as he scrunched into gear and made for the hangar bay doors.The Hippy stood there watching the socks come towards him. It had not yet registered with him that the socks intended to make him their next victim.

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPHPHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!

A still surviving navigator gasped in the thick atmosphere.

"I c...c....can't b....b....b....breathe!" This was a gross display of overacting as the navigator had never had a stutter before in his life. The Hippy suddenly had a bright idea (it was a blue moon they were orbiting).

"I'll open a window, then you can all breathe again"

The Hippy released the window catch and suddenly found himself clinging to the outside of a small shuttle craft. He crawled forward and knocked on the front window. Science officer sock was so surprised he let go of the shuttle controls, and it was pulled off course by the gravitational pull of the planet. The spacecraft span around and around flinging the Hippy out into free fall. The Hippy saw the flash of intense light as the shuttlecraft crashed on the surface of the moon. As he fell through the air he suddenly realised that this was it, he was quite probably going to die, unless the author could think of some plausible excuse to keep him alive before the next episode.