s the Hippy fell towards the blue moon he began to feel a little faint, but the faint flew away and the hippy was left alone once more. The Hippy's whole life flashed before his eyes, but he got bored and fell asleep during the adverts. When he awoke he was still alive, and still falling, or at least he thought he was falling, something was keeping him aloft.

The sky was a clear pale blue, much like the moon that he was orbiting, there didn't seem to be much hope for him though. The Hippy re-read the last sentence and suddenly realised that he was orbiting the moon, he wasn't falling at all. This was an amazing stroke of luck, though not nearly as lucky as the fact that he seemed able to breathe in the non-atmosphere of the planets gravitational field.

A piercing beam of white light erupted from the moon surface below him and he was suddenly falling for real, very fast. This was finally it the hippy was going to die for certain, definitely, finito, no more Hippy, curtains, as a doornail, he was about to kick the bucket, pass away, make a large splodgy mess on the surface of the planet, yes, this was IT. Then as luck would have it, the almost certain demise of the Hippy was interrupted by a large sum of cash fed into the authors private swiss bank account, which meant that the Hippy could not possibly die, or the author would lose lots and lots of money.

The Hippy bounced along the surface of the planet like an elephant on helium. BOUNCE over the large dust capped mountains.

BOUND over the large voluminous craters.

BOING over the large open plained savannahs which were almost entirely comprised of moon dust funnily enough.

SPLAT into the side of a cliff. The Hippy slowly slid down the cliff face and fell through a small opening at the base of the cliff that led into a polished tunnel that the Hippy proceeded to slide down saying: "Ooh! Ooh! Mr Peevley! Mr Peevley!" The tunnel was long and the hippy emerged at last falling into a stagnant pool of blue gray sludge, he felt very at home.

The blue gray sludge awoke slowly and was disturbed to find a greasy hippy sitting in it. The sludge asked the hippy to get off, but the hippy merely replied: "Oh wow". There wasn't much the sludge could do. It had no physical form other than a pool of sludge, and it had no mental abilities making it an even match for the hippy. The sludge decided that if the hippy wasn't going to move, then it would have to digest him. The hippy began to sink into the sludge. Then a very strange thing happened. A small void opened in the air above the sludge and sucked in all matter within the immediate vicinity, this included the hippy and the sludge. They were flung into an immense void whose sheer scale was enough to make any NORMAL being feel so insignificant they actually became insignificant and wasted away, luckily for the hippy and the sludge their combined mental power was so small the void didn't notice that they were there.

They spent aeons in the void travelling without feeling, the hippy slept through most of it, and the sludge only had a memory of about ten minutes duration so it didn't really notice anything odd. Then came the day when the void opened and deposited the hippy and the sludge in a temporal time field situated twenty feet above Piccadilly circus.

The void withdrew and naturally the hippy and the sludge fell to the ground. The hippy awoke in time to see a concrete paving slab smash into his face and found that he was still lying in a pool of blue gray sludge. The hippy looked up straight into the eyes of an assembled mass of japanese tourists who were busily using up the last shots on the end of their films. The hippy stood up and the rapidly growing audience clapped. The hippy was a bit bewildered. The blue gray sludge sludged in the way that blue gray sludges do.

"Did you see thaat! Goddamn hippy just appeared in mid air, gollly!"

"Tex, are you sure ya didn't have a McDonalds at lunch, you know how they make you hallucinate"

The two Spams.....er......Americans argued amongst themselves then amongst the japanese and weren't content until they'd argued with some police and finally gone to invade the Russian embassy. The hippy and the sludge had meanwhile used the distraction to withdraw to a safe point. The hippy rapidly moved the plot along

"Well, we have fallen to earth and I have special powers, you and I are going to become super crime fighters and I get to wear sexy ladies underwear outside my jeans which haven't been washed for several million years."

The sludge sludged in a sludgey kind of way. The hippy understood perfectly.

"By the way whats your name?" said the hippy. "sludge" said the sludge sludging along after the hippy leaving a trail of sludgey sludge behind him as he sludged along in a sludgey kind of way that only sludges are capable of on the planet sludge and.....help I'm stuck in this sentence of sludge..................!!!!

The next installment will continue the story and tell of the hippies first crimefighting case, provided the author can escape from the sludgey sentence of sludge he got himself into talking about sludge and sludges in general being sludge like and sludging around all day and sludging into each other because they are as intelligent as pools of sludge and.....eek... i'm stuck in another sentence of sludge that won't sludge .....arrrrrghhhhhh!

INTERMISSION

"Kingsley"

"Yes Lorraine"

"I want it now"

"What here ?"

"Now Kingsley" zip!

"But don't you think it's a bit dangerous seeing as we are in the middle lane of the M5 travelling at over 109 m.p.h.?

"Now Kingsley and I want it doggy style as usual"

"......"

"Now Kingsley"

"Oh wow....."